Lady at the Gate

First things first

2011-04-08T22:25:00.000+03:00

Ilkka gave private lessonettes today (an actual lesson would be longer than five minutes :) Unsurprisingly, mine was about not fudging things together but doing separate things separately. Like, for instance, first ensuring I don't get hit, and only then hitting the other guy.

You'd think I would have learned this in nine years of swords, but then, you'd think that of a lot of stuff I've failed to learn.

Learning to fence, part II

2011-03-06T21:04:00.000+02:00

So, it's been a while since I went to the SESH salle. In fact, I'm afraid I may have let my membership lapse by mistake, but then again, not only is the school no longer in desperate need of my euros, but I've begun to think that paying, on average, 50 euros per class may not be the best possible use of my limited funds. (Annual fee + monthly training fee comes to about that, if I manage to attend one class a month. But numbers are not my strong suite.)

Instead, I've been training (when I've been training) at the EHMS. Instead of owning a salle, EHMS has training sessions in various places around Espoo, all of them remarkably closer to my Espoo home that Jakomäki is. Even the times are more convenient (although it says something about my social life that I find Friday night a convenable time to train), especially now that there are two sessions a week. To my surprise I also find that I enjoy the slightly ad hoc feeling of the migratory school.

The training that Ilkka leads at EHMS feels very different from Guy's at SESH. On the one hand, I really enjoy the sessions at the Jakomäki salle that fill all the senses and employ all the faculties, where a class without sections on body mechanics and wrestling is incomplete, and where the warm-up alone is liable to disable you from actual training. (Yep, I'm very much out of shape and keep forgetting it.) On the other hand, EHMS is lighter, easier on the ego, less likely to induce angst about incompetence.

Most of the differences are due simply to the fact that I've trained at Jakomäki for nine years (if you consider my last three to have qualified as training) and that time has encompassed a lot of things: advancing quickly to become a free scholar and class leader, then having two children and falling back into regular student-hood with all the attendant difficulties of motivation, status and skill deficit... All accompanied by acute emotions, I'm not ashamed to admit. So whenever I step in the salle door, the past hits me in the face with almost palpable force and by the time I've changed into my black-and-whites I'm sweating with annoyance and anxiety. Not to mention envy of anyone who's been with the school for less time that I but who outperforms me, which includes almost everybody. My problems are mostly, if not exclusively, in my own head and heart, but that doesn't make them less real. At EHMS I can leave all that crap behind and just fence. And although the Bolognese style is not as thoroughly me as Fiore's longsword, I end up going more often because it's just easier on so many levels.

One concrete difference I can point to is the number of reps. Ilkka has us do lots more repetitions of each action before going on to the next technique, and at EHMS I haven't really had the experience yet of my head becoming full before the class ends. At SESH my brain usually fills up about halfway through the longsword material, and I maintain that this is not due to it being a more complicated art but rather to Guy's way of having less reps in favour of covering more material. I'm kinda dumb, and the less-brain-more-brawn is more suited to my personal learning profile.

After a months-long hiatus in training, and then basically coming to a whole new style on restarting, it's interesting to observe what happens to old skills and reflexes. Last Friday I was painfully aware of my hands having forgotten how to cut. Today, to my delight, they had begun to remember. My basic footwork is awful, but the slightly more advanced footwork is actually passable. I'm also now beginning to get back into a training mentality, instead of the "I can beat you, I want to beat you!" insanity of the past few weeks.

A sword is never just a sword

2011-01-21T22:43:00.001+02:00

High drama available here: I believe I'm quitting swords, at least for a while. At one school my swords get lost or break, at another they're never given to me. I'm superstitious about swords, so I'm definitely taking this as a sign that it's time to give up.

This is for the best, anyway. I'm turning 39 this year. Historically, most swordsmen were dead before they ever reached that age, or crippled at the very least, by which we infer that swords come with an age limit. Also, I'm quite old enough to be a grandmother. Go ahead, picture your granny with a sword. Get my point yet?

The only thing I regret is that I have absolutely nothing to show for these nine years. I'm still the clumsy, uncoordinated fool I was when I first set foot in the Jakomäki salle. I advanced once, but it's been downhill for a very long time, all the way down to the bottom. And I don't even have a sword because, you know, they're all either lost, broken or never received. I would have liked to keep at least one for when I'm actually a grandmother, to show little Raimo and Ritva and tell them "This used to be granny's weapon!" And their eyes would shine, and they'd go: "Oh g'wan, pull the other one!" And then I'd take out The Swordsman's Companion and show them my picture, and they'd be all "Wow, granny! You used to be really thin!"

Ah well.

Of course, I do have something to show for it all: friends. For a little while, at least, until they move on with their studies and I move on with home life and work, and we become too different to have anything to say to each other.

You know, right now I really need someone to tell me that it'll be okay, that swords are not the only thing worth having in the world.

I'll probably delete this post tomorrow, swallow my anger and go back. I always go back. I've swallowed too much crap at this point to refuse this load, big though it is. (But if you swallow too much crap, do you turn to crap inside?) (And is it possible to feel too sorry for yourself to keep living?)

EDIT: and then I found this picture.

Centre and balance

2010-06-09T06:16:00.005+03:00

The key to balance is finding the centre, rather like the balance point of a sword is found by balancing it on one finger and finding the place where letting go with your other hand doesn't cause the sword to fall on the floor with a godawful noise. Finding your own balance point, your centre, is similar.

I have terrible balance. Guy agrees, the instructor at the yoga class I took agrees, my mother agrees, and anyone who has seen me stumbling against doorframes or spill drinks or simply sway suddenly when standing quietly in line in class will agree. You may say this is a problem in my inner ear. I'm not saying you're not right, but improving my balance doesn't require inner ear surgery.

The key to finding my centre, my balance point, (and this is personal - you may well have your own key, and if you'd like to tell me in comments what it is I would be very interested) is figuring out what things are part of me and what things are not part of me. This is one of those Big Life Lessons for me, because I have a poor sense of personal boundaries. So if I manage to define my boundaries, say clearly for example: "That chair is on the outside; that person is on the outside; this arm is on the inside; this head is on the inside...", then my brain knows what are valid objects to try to adjust and align in order to achieve balance.

Do, or do not. There is no try.

2010-05-06T21:32:00.002+03:00

When you're trying to aim a parry, the right frame of mind is NOT "this bit of my blade must touch that bit of her blade". The way to aim a parry is "I'll catch that with this".

The difference is one of unity. Thinking of it as a catch, a hit, a ding, or whatever your preference is, unifies the action into something that has a certain shape. That shape may involve two bits of steel approaching and then hitting each other, but this is not essential; what is essential is the general shape of the action.

Kind of like trying to touch your forefingers together with your arms straight. If you just move both fingers and try to aim one at the other, you fumble. If you just execute the action where two hands and fingers join, you just do it.

Cutting exercise

2010-03-18T18:38:00.002+02:00

Guy taught me the new (well, not so new anymore) cutting exercise yesterday. It goes (Italian grammar notwithstanding): fendenti+sottani, mezani, punti. Simple as anything :)

I went to class last night.

2010-03-12T11:56:00.002+02:00

Just wanted to let everybody know that I actually trained last night. After almost two months of being sick, it felt wonderful!

And to make this post halfway useful for some people: when cutting, remember to keep the left hand alive.

Bitchslap

2010-03-08T14:17:00.001+02:00

Bitchslap: a brilliant collection of articles by a female martial artist, ranging from sparring to childbirth.

Fiore spear stuff

2010-01-06T21:28:00.001+02:00

(I'm reposting this from July 8, 2008, because the original entry is collecting masses of spam comments.)

Henrik Waddell from Sweden taught us his new form for practising Fiore's spear techniques. It was great! The class offered two or three big insights, one about training and a few about the spear as a weapon, and I'll try to explain my thoughts on the latter here; the ones about training have an entry of their own.

The hardest thing for me when using a spear is maintaining the correct distance, because the distance depends on the exact location and position of the hands; they can basically be placed anywhere along the shaft of the spear, they can be palm up or palm down in any combination, and to make matters worse, you have to shift your grip every now and then. No doubt this will get easier with practice, because after all, the thing only has one balance point and it should be easy to deduce how long the "tail" behind your hands is from where the balance point is. But the distance is chosen on the basis of a group of variables, whereas with the longsword the blade always has the same effective length and your grip doesn't shift around like a shifty-roundy thing.

The height of the back hand turned out to be important, at least for me. Just like a sword, you control the direction of the spear with the back hand while the forward hand creates a stable point to rotate it around, but a spear is much longer and the back hand has a number of possible places to be in; and moving it slightly has a much more complicated effect on the spear.

I had especial difficulty with getting the butt end of the spear to pass before me when shifting sides, e.g. when exchanging the thrust from finestra. The key is to think forward, not across. Don't reach, because that leads to overreaching; just think of going forward right from the start, not about setting aside the other spear. Surprisingly this is more crucial than where you grip the spear. (Within reason, of course.)

The spear is a wonderful weapon: simple, elegant and very good at what it does. And besides, it makes clear much about Fiore's system that the sword bits alone don't. Somehow the underlying body mechanics and physics of Fiore's system are easier to grasp with a spear in your hand, not because the spear is a simpler weapon (although it is) but because, well, because it feels like that is where it all comes from, like the spear system underlies all the others. It doesn't, abrazare does (right?), but the spear distills it somehow.

Using someone else's sword

2009-10-02T21:18:00.005+03:00

That's what I'm doing now. That's what I should have done when I asked a guy who is two meters tall and wears about 100 kg of muscle to come at me with a really hard mezano cut, against which I then defended with appropriate force. This resulted in my sword coming apart so that the tang broke and the pommel came off. Of course I should have made sure to prevent such an impact when the swords crossed.

It was a three-year-old spada da zhogo, polished to a nice shine by Jan and engraved with my personal insignia, so I do feel its loss a bit... But then again, now I get to have a new sword as soon as I can afford one! I know just what I want: something a bit heavier in the blade to keep me in line and lend a bit of authority to the proceedings. In the meantime, I get much-needed practice with different kinds of blade.

EDIT: added pics.

Balance tip

2009-09-13T21:40:00.001+03:00

Here is an interesting balance tip, fresh from tonight's yoga class: for an extra balance point, focus your eyes on something immobile, and that thing then becomes your third leg. While doing this literally is not very useful when swords are being swung at your head, the concept might be worth exploring during class or at least warm-up.

Wobbly motivation to keep climbing the same hill

2009-08-03T21:24:00.004+03:00

Ever since the Fiore Extravaganza, I've had serious trouble motivating myself to attend regular classes. The Extravaganza offered a great step-by-step exploration of a coherent system, giving masses of insights undreamed of and a potential way to integrate those individual insights into a framework. It was also intensive, providing training opportunities almost daily for a week and a half. Thus it approached the way I *want* to pursue my swordsmanship studies: intelligent, intensive training within a logical, mature system. (This is not to exclude the huge load of mindless repetition, which is what my stupid body requires to actually learn new ways of moving and which I also like as a counterweight to all that thinking.)

Since then, I've found practically no internal motivation to practise set drills outside (or let's say on the outskirts of) Fiore. I've been hard pressed to keep wanting to expend brain power on learning and re-learning basically the same set drills I've been doing for years, which I don't see as contributing much anymore to this deeper understanding of swordsmanship that I want. I appreciate that others want, like and need to train that way - hey, it was the right way for me to train for years and years, I'm not likely to bash it! - but the hill I have to climb every single time I miss a few classes is looking like a smaller part of the landscape every time I scale it.

It is true that there are always new things to learn in old material. It is true that I haven't attained anything like the top of the hill, as it were. (I should, I suppose, be getting quite good at climbing it, though...) It is true that the lessons you end up learning and need to learn are not always those you set out to learn. However... I don't feel like I'm going anywhere or learning anything much anymore.

However, I can certainly never learn to be an adequate swordsman if I don't train, so it's better to train something that nothing at all.

Fiore arrived!

2009-07-17T06:41:00.003+03:00

My copy of Tom Leoni's new translation of Fior di Battaglia has arrived. It has already produced one new insight: not only Posta Breve of the sword in two hands but also the four guards of abrazare are described as having no stability. (Mr Leoni translates the expressions differently, but I have such a problem with reading translated works in general that I'm reading the original, Malipiero's transcription and Leoni's translation at the same time.)

Cut with the point, part II

2009-05-23T23:19:00.001+03:00

Cutting with the point rather than the wrist is also fairly crucial in getting the true-edge cut from the Master of the sword in one hand to work. (That cut in the Syllabus Form, you know?)

Bolognaised

2009-05-23T23:05:00.003+03:00

Ilkka's course in Bolognaise swordsmanship ended in a feast of spaghetti Bolognaise (made by Ken, in other words very good). Marozzo.com has footage. (No, not spaghetti footage.) Spot yours truly standing around, wiggling her butt and looking girlish. [Forehead, meet table.]

It was an excellent course, giving solid basics in the system and drilling those basics in deep enough that even I might actually remember some of it in half a year's time. I actually liked the fact that we had "rest weeks" in between (especially as I would have been forced to miss three classes, as opposed to none, otherwise - sometimes life really works out :) because this way, the training was spread out over a longer period of time and the ol' brain cells were activated and reactivated more times. But then I'm just a super-slow learner.

I hope I'll be able to attend the next course that Ilkka is promising to give - in the autumn, was it? Bolognaise, Part Deux.

Health conquers

2009-05-15T21:48:00.003+03:00

I'm taking Ilkka's brilliant Bolognaise course, but I've been having some bad luck with injuries and illness. Today I managed to stick out the entire class for the second time during the course. Yay!

(Of course, when I got home my stomach started aching badly enough to bend me double, my throat became sore, and I suspect that elbow will be mad at me tomorrow, but still...)

Cut with the point

2009-05-11T22:15:00.002+03:00

I've picked up an annoying tendency to cut not with the point but with the hands, or wrists. Today after an insight into the mechanics of it all I tested the two types of cuts on a tyre. There was no appreciable difference in the power conveyed, but the wristy cut bounced all over the place while the point cut stayed on target. Interesting effect.

Quick notification

2009-04-23T21:35:00.003+03:00

Just to let my huge audience know, I'm not on some angst-filled training break, I'm not injured, I'm not dead - I'm merely devoting my time to earning money. Without money, there can be no payment of training fees, no new swords, no new kit, no weekend courses... And the bottom of the barrel has been scraped right clean during these years of four people living off a single income. The lady started to act her age and got a job.

Sticks and needlework

2009-03-25T21:31:00.003+02:00

In life, you generally tend to get what you ask for. Especially when you're at the salle and indicate that you need either to get beaten up or to beat someone up. I did that today in free training, because my brain was in a coma and needed a wake-up call - or not so much my brain but my motivation - and Guy just picked up his new stick (coated with plastic so that the blood is easy to wipe off) and told me to get out of the way and then to take it away from him and hit him. Man, it was fun! But then, hitting Guy very hard always is.

After the beating I was well enough to tackle cutting exercises and the Syllabus Form, the latter with applications. I got two wrong, being on the wrong side for both breakings of the thrust (or is that breakings of the thrusts? Thrust-breakings?). I'm an absolute duff at the applications but it's coming along.

And while we're on the topic: Finns, please note that "applications to the form" does NOT translate "applikaatiot formiin". Applikaatio is a sewing thing. ;)

Lightfooted

2009-03-12T22:17:00.003+02:00

I've figured out how it's done and weeks of empirical testing (of which weeks two were spent mostly not training due to flu, but never mind) attests to the efficacy of the method. So here it is: to keep your rear foot active after stepping and get your weight to travel to your front foot properly, treat each step as a one-two combo where both feet move. You don't actually have to pick up and move the rear leg; for me, at least, it's enough to think about it moving, to treat the back leg as the natural second part of the step.

It's also worth remembering when standing still. Then the key is to behave like you're always intending to step with both feet.

Wrestling kicks ass!

2009-03-01T11:42:00.003+02:00

A group of eight students from the school attended a wrestling free training session on Saturday. We did some of Fiore's abrazare stuff (and for the first time I saw a context for the whole thing that actually works - instead of starting out standing opposite each other with feet and hands placed just there and just so, it was all about the other guy coming in to grab and your reacting to it. No doubt this is some new-fangled way of setting up abrazare exercises that I've just managed to miss at the salle :) The padded floor made it possible to throw and squash partners, allowing us to practise a wider range of techniques than the hard concrete of the salle floor.

What with the seven other participants being men, some of them pretty big, you might expect yours truly to have her ass kicked. Well, I did, by Topi, but he apologised for his foot accidentally making sharpish contact with my behind while we were both engaging other training partners. And one exercise where the point was to make your partner suffer maximum discomfort and prevent their breathing by lying on top of them and digging your ribcage or hip into their ribcage or belly and then preventing them from getting up... well, I was partnered with Otto. I could not shift him. In that exercise, I hasten to add, because it became abundantly clear that wrestling is not about strength or weight ratios, it's all in the mind. It's easier to access that knowledge when lying on the ground, though, than when a 65 kg female is trying to throw a 90 kg male with the, um, nth play of the first master of dagger. (Can't find my Fiore to check, right now. sorry.)

I did discover my Inner Female, however, as for the first time ever was I heard to utter the words "but I don't want to hurt you!" in training. Don't worry, she was banished within seconds and I properly strangled Topi until he tapped out.

Concentrate

2009-01-29T20:41:00.003+02:00

Guy gave us some heat today about not focusing properly on what we were doing. If you allow your concentration to fail in the middle of a drill, he said, you will do it in freeplay. When training, you should do drills until you decide to stop doing drills, and NOT stop with your brain shutting down. Now, as a person who routinely struggles with her brain dropping threads randomly, I thought I'd share a couple of my survival tricks.

First: count reps. Decide that you're going to do, say, five reps; then count them as you go, saying the number of the rep to yourself for the duration of the rep.

Second: count or name actions or guard positions. It is actually very useful for learning, too, to identify each guard position or action as you move through it. But if you can't remember the names, numbers will do. So will swish-ding-bash-broing (that's first drill in Auri-ese).

Third: imagine you're someone else, someone you admire. Mace Windu wouldn't vaguely wave his sword at an opponent, he'd be focused, he'd be competent, he'd be mean! Otherwise he would have his arms cut off and be thrown out of a window. (No, wait...) Luke Skywalker wouldn't whine about how tired he was or how heavy the sword was. (Um. I clearly need to work on these examples some more ;)

Fourth: imagine you have an audience. Either you're doing your drill in front of a roomful of people, or someone you really want to impress, like your significant other or, well, Luke Skywalker or someone, is watching.

In exchange, can someone please give some pointers about how not to keep zoning out while standing around, listening and watching?

When 900 years old you age, piss as nice, you will not - hmm?

2009-01-29T20:37:00.002+02:00

Yoda wet himself today. I had put my Yoda backpack on the floor at the salle while I took off my shoes, and when I picked him up again, the floor was wet and so was Yoda's behind. The telltale smell of herbal medicine wafted through the salle. I find that scent somehow... apt.

Five push-ups

2009-01-29T09:26:00.002+02:00

Unbelievably, I've been able to execute a total of five push-ups correctly: first two, then three more. And I mean correctly: only hands and toes touching the floor, the body straight and only the arms bending. No nodding, no butt-rise, no anything. Go me!

After all, I've only been doing "push-ups" for five and a half years...

Fiore segno animals in the Bible

2009-01-10T12:55:00.003+02:00

I'm sure this is blindingly obvious to any good Christian who studies his/her Bible, but this passage from Proverbs (30:29-31) is news to me:

29 There be three things which go well, yea, four are comely in going:

30 A lion which is strongest among beasts, and turneth not away for any;

31 A greyhound; an he goat also; and a king, against whom there is no rising up.

Interesting collection, no? Lion, greyhound, the lynx with his crown... We're still missing the elephant, unless he's masquerading as a ram. But hey, the ram and the elephant are both symbols of Christ. Of course so are quite a few other animals...

Reply for Kevin

2008-12-15T23:25:00.001+02:00

The word verification feature for Kevin's blog isn't working, so I can't reply to his post about why everything is so quiet on the sword front these days. So here's the reply, as it's relevant to this blog, too :)

.......
Heh, well, having a life certainly does reduce the time you get to spend on swordy things. Um, shouldn't that sentence end "...on work"? Or is it, "Work certainly does reduce the time you get to spend on life"? Oh, heck, I don't know :)

Anyway, I try not to update my blog when I have nothing worthwhile to say, so if nothing interesting occurs to me during training, I don't report the training because that's just boring to read. But usually the fact is that I come home from the salle exhausted, read my e-mails, by which time it's eleven pm, so I yawn and go to bed. Then the next morning the kids wake me up -> no screen time to type up training notes. By evening I've forgotten what I wanted to write... So yes, life, lots of it. Now work, too.

People are supposed to be able to semi-hibernate during winter, anyway, conserving energy, sitting quietly by the fireside knitting and doing little odd jobs put off during the hectic summer months... Why do we moderns schedule our most hectic time in winter and vacation in summer?!?

Blade relationship

2008-12-15T23:19:00.002+02:00

(No, the title is not a reference to our School's tendency to act as an extraordinary matchmaking office.)

In rapier class today, I grokked how to use your forte to find your partner's debole while using your own debole to attack. Yay me! It's just a question of using the forte as a shield and twisting your mind a bit so that you remember you're holding both a shield and a point in the same hand.

Guy just pointed out that after seven years of doing rapier, it's about time. Somehow it seems he gives meaner comments when teaching rapier. Whine whine. Feel bad. Whine.

Two years of blogging!

2008-12-08T21:27:00.002+02:00

Wow, this blog passed its second birthday quite unnoticed. That was the day I wore an Intermediate shirt to class for the first time. Two years ago I was angsting over whether I would ever lead classes again, and anxiously awaiting word that I could travel to China for my second daughter. Where did the years go? :-O

Smoked out

2008-12-08T21:19:00.002+02:00

Rapier and me, we get on like a house on fire... Especially when the fire in question, located immediately next to the salle building, cuts short the rapier lesson and sends us out into the night not quite coughing but at least holding our breath. Yuck. A fire of old tyres and stuff gives off a truly noxious smell. About half of Jakomäki seemed to be enjoying the show, however, as they had gathered round the block, downwind, perhaps under the impression that a new mega disco had moved into the neighbourhood.

The left leg that I once fractured, you know, the drunken brawling injury, has recently given off annoying twinges, and really got into the irritating act with rapier. When I leaned my weight on it, it hurt like the devil. Ilkka, who sometimes seems like an avatar of Guy, commented: "Well, do it so that it doesn't hurt. I can't tell you how, though."

Feeling blue, a.k.a. The T-Shirt Thing, Take II

2008-12-04T21:22:00.003+02:00

Auri: "Are we out of size M t-shirts?"
Ilkka: "We've ordered more."
Guy: "Auri, why are you getting a t-shirt with black text? You should be getting a blue one. You're entitled!"
Auri: "I'm entitled?"
Guy: "Yes! You've passed the Basic level, you're an Intermediate. That's what blue means."
Auri: "Ok, good. 'Cause we've got size M in blue. ... I wore a blue-printed one to class yesterday and hoped no one would notice, but that's just because the cats pissed on all the other ones..."

Keep breathing

2008-12-04T21:13:00.003+02:00

Breathing exercises today. We didn't just do the expected crane and Assorted Breathing Stuff; we examined breath patterns, both our partners' and our own, and tried to vary our attacks accordingly. I'm not sure what this was supposed to accomplish, as the success of the dagger attacks or the lack of same depended only on things other than the breath cycles of the parties, at least as far as I could see - I could detect no correlation whatsoever.

We also did drills so that a single execution of the drill lasted the length of a single breath by the attacking party, first the outbreath and then the inbreath. For me, the inbreath produced a surprising improvement in technique and execution, which was cool.

According to Guy, the most important thing about breathing in martial arts is to keep doing it; not stopping, not changing (not unwittingly, at least), but just remembering to breathe continuously and naturally.

Syllabus day

2008-11-29T18:35:00.001+02:00

Yay, intermediate again. The basic days are over. Now it's back to feeling stupid and being yelled at by Guy.

...why did I want to be an intermediate, again?

(More on the syllabus seminar later, hopefully, but now I've got to rush to the salle party.)

Not very taxing

2008-11-28T22:12:00.003+02:00

On Thursday I realised that swords classes tend not to be very physically taxing anymore. All this time, I've thought in terms of "aaaargh, I have to move my limbs around and get tired and sweaty, aaargh!" when in reality, that's just not the case. Sure, the warm-up can cause a certain amount of sweating, but the class itself rarely does. Every now and then when I do rapier work, my arm and back leg get really tired, and that's where lack of conditioning tells; but longsword is just so relaxing and natural that it's been ages since a single 1.5-hour class made me tired or even a 3-hour one.

This is definitely a change from the last time I re-started training, when I built up huge amounts of muscle because I was so adamant that I knew all that stuff already that I just muscled through instead of improving my technique. Maybe this is the other end of that continuum: I'm in crap condition, but can hold my own against bigger and stronger guys.

Some sort of middle way would seem to be indicated...

Learning styles

2008-11-17T14:21:00.003+02:00

A nifty table for determining whether you learn primarily through auditory, visual or kinesthetic&tactile means can be found here.

This page explains the Myers-Brigg type indicators (extraversion/introversion, sensing/intuition, thinking/feeling, judging/perceptive) of learning styles.

(An interesting point is that while the first link gives me a clear result (I'm primarily kinesthetic&tactile with visual a close second), the results of my informal MBTI profiling would fluctuate wildly depending on which of my "gears" I'm in. I have a go-getter gear where I'm disciplined, resourceful, creative, positive, extraverted etc., and then I have a neutral gear when I'm lazy, slow, stupid, negative, introverted etc. My life divides itself into periods with one or the other gear dominating strongly, these periods lasting anything between 2 months to perhaps a year or so. Last year around this time I was stuck in neutral; in spring I switched to go-getter gear, but in a quiet mode. Now I'm recovering from a short bout of neutral. I'm tempted to blame this on the ADHD, which causes fluctuation in neurotransmitter levels, but I could just be bipolar.)

Heel!

2008-11-04T10:19:00.002+02:00

For the past month or two, I've been trying to correct a fatal error in my footwork: that of grounding through both feet. What needs to happen is to ground through one foot and leave the other light as a butterfly, which results in being able to step quickly and without signalling the intention. What tends to happen is that I put my weight on both feet and then, when I need to step, I first rock backwards or forwards to mobilise a leg and only then get to take that step.

Another persistent footwork error of mine is always stepping onto the ball of my foot or onto my toes. This would be more or less fine (arguments on the subject notwithstanding; Guy is relaxed on the topic) except for one thing: I tend to do this solely for the purpose of controlling my forward movement by stopping myself with my toes. As a result, I step in a stilted, halting manner rather than moving forward and back in a fluid, continuous manner.

I'm making progress in fixing these, but it's nowhere near as fast as I would hope.

Mask, gambeson, elbows, knees and gauntlets...

2008-10-31T06:40:00.002+02:00

Mask, gambeson, elbows, knees and gauntlets,
Mask, gambeson, elbows, knees and gauntlets,
Strike and cut and avoid the pommelstrike,
Mask, gambeson, elbows, knees and gauntlets!
(Tune: Head, shoulders, knees and toes)

Freeplay yesterday, and I'm glad to report I gave as good as I got. I seem to have exchanged my former tendency to guard and strike low and ignore the high lines for a tendency to guard and strike high and ignore the low lines, but at least it's a step in the right direction.

I've usually been either hyper or scared witless during freeplay, but this time the only rush of adrenaline to register on the mental gauge was the one caused by my gambeson still fitting me.

Freeplay took place in very short bursts because people are also trained to see and remember what happened and recreate it on demand. I'm still not sure how I feel about this change, nothing, I suppose.

Fencing with the Stars?

2008-10-30T10:39:00.002+02:00

Let's make a swordy version of the popular format Dances with the Stars! Brilliant idea, no?

The Importance of Getting Feedback

2008-10-27T20:49:00.003+02:00

Woohoo, I assisted in class today for the first time in a year or two :) Now, why is this important to me? There may actually be some readers who might benefit from the information, so I'll indulge myself. Firstly, it tells me that Guy trusts me not to crack his skull open by accident, seeing as how he demonstrates without his mask so people can hear; in other words, I haven't acted irresponsibly recently. Secondly, it tells me that my general form is good enough for other students to be allowed to see; so I can stop obsessing about it and occasionally focus on something else. While maintaining good form, obviously. And thirdly, it makes me feel noticed; I'm high-maintenance, in case you haven't figured that out!

Also, Guy praised my pommelstrike in first drill during the demonstration, which makes me feel all warm and fuzzy :)

Move from stillness

2008-10-23T09:48:00.002+03:00

When doing cutting exercises or form, one should take enough time to reset between strikes so that the movement that went before does not interfere with the movement that is happening. I tend to elide from technique to technique in a vague way, and this makes each technique harder to execute correctly because my stance and direction are still being influenced by the previous technique when they should only be governed by the one I'm actually performing. Isolating the techniques by pausing to reset properly between them makes them more crisp and correct.

This is not to say that. Form. Needs. To. Be. Exe-cuted. Like. This. But it certainlyshouldnotbelikethiseither. Training both ways in moderation is the way to learn to execute movements in a smooth and continuous yet crisp and clear manner.

Learning by osmosis

2008-10-23T09:40:00.003+03:00

Last night, Joeli remarked that I seemed to be an osmotic student: I often sit at the salle and watch the class. There are several reasons, two of which have their bedtime at 20-21 and go nuts if mommy makes an unscheduled appearance ;) But I also believe that it's beneficial to just sit and watch every now and then without the distraction of physical action. Certainly listening teaches different sorts of things than doing.

Yesterday I learned, along with Joeli, that the extent to which you wind up posta di donna is related to the distance in which you strike: winding it deep across your back results in a greater distance because it takes a longer time for the blade to travel into frontale, while just placing the blade on your shoulder gives a short tempo/distance.

EDIT: Fixed "...teaches different sorts of things than learning". Jeez...

I'm still alive...

2008-10-12T21:32:00.002+03:00

I haven't disappeared or anything since my last post :) I've just been busy with two things: training and looking after my daughter, who is recovering from surgery. I have a small pile of training notes I keep meaning to type up here but I never quite find the time to do it.

He passed!

2008-10-12T21:20:00.003+03:00

Ilkka passed the seminar teaching test that was part of his assistant instructor exam at SESH. Congrats! :) :) I assume this means he's assistant instructor now or sometime in the near future, but no one's actually said that yet.

And it was a great sidesword seminar, too. Ilkka had obviously invested a lot of time and effort in preparation. He taught in a clear, concise manner that made it easy to remember things - and for me, for example, remembering what the exercise is for long enough to actually start doing it is not a given - both in the short term and in the long term.

Gone was the confusion with the names of the guards and the basic feeling of wrongness I described earlier. It's perfectly simple. The guards on the front (inside the right knee) are iron doors. The guards at the back (outside the right knee) are long tails. And you just let it all hang out and move in a natural way :)

Admittedly handling the sword was, by far, the most strenuous part of the seminar. The sword in question being Topi's fairly serious backsword didn't help things much, although it was a much better option than a rapier.

(Post edited on 13.10., excitement moderated.)

The Bug

2008-09-19T22:02:00.003+03:00

(I promise this is the last time I'll bore you with my status issues! :)

There is a slight bug in this "my name is mud, treat me like I'm no one" scheme: what happens when I no longer want to be treated like no one? Do I just march up to someone and say, please stop it now, I'm back? Geeez...

I've certainly cooked an ugly bowl of soup for myself and don't really fancy eating any more, thank you. Unfortunately I'm pretty sure that some nameless cruel, nasty and annoying people called Ilkka will keep ladling more hot stuff into my bowl for years to come. I'm only grateful that by now it just makes me laugh, too :D

Ouchie again

2008-09-10T22:07:00.002+03:00

About halfway through tonight's longsword class, I got kicked in the thumb. It hurt. To my mumblings about maybe giving pair drills a miss tonight, Guy's sympathetic reply was: "So do it left-handed." So I did. It wasn't as hard as I thought it would be, although I literally couldn't feel if I was holding the sword the right way up and tended to take frontale with the palm down.

The thumb still hurts, but it's probably just bruised.

Lunging right, part n

2008-09-10T22:04:00.002+03:00

This is a public service announcement.

When lunging, it's less tiring to do it properly with the rear foot turning and the toes propelling you forward by that extra 10 cm (!), rather than planting your rear foot in the ground and waiting for it to bear fruit.

When lunging, remember to close the line before moving a single toe forward.

What's in a name

2008-09-10T21:58:00.003+03:00

First drill starts with the initiator in posta di donna and the partner in porta di ferro.

Lady at the Gate!

After almost two years of blogging, I've discovered a useful reference for the name of this blog.

Ladies and gentlemen

2008-09-10T21:38:00.004+03:00

There is a regrettable tendency at the school for fit young men to train with other fit young men, avoiding eye contact with women, children, the elderly and the handicapped when training pairs are being formed. This is annoying. While I personally train with whoever I like and will pull your sleeve if you ignore me, not all of us gurls are so unbecomingly forward. But what I saw today really took the cake: for the first 2-4 pair exercises in the longsword class, not only were the fit young men training only with other fit young men, they were also training at the other end of the salle from us gurls, separated by a wide swath of empty space.

Not all fit young men do this, by the way. The more experienced ones generally don't. The more intelligent ones never do. But please, gentlemen, get a grip. And please, ladies, don't be so damn gurly!

I actually have a fair bit of sympathy for the fit young men. I've been known to declare, myself, that I don't like to train with gurls because they're all soft and tend to giggle; and you "have to" keep apologising and generally being nice and sociable, whereas with most blokes, you can just get on with training. (This is only a problem because I'm not a nice, sociable person.) But I was wrong about gurls being all soft, or rather, the significance of them being soft. When starting out, women tend to be hesitant and careful in physical activities, whereas men tend to be overbea-... viole-... um, over-enthusiastic. Neither quality makes them good training partners. As they progress, each sex develops the good qualities already inherent in the other (on average, of course. I'm not really a woman myself by this description :) and they learn to be good training parters. What this boils down to is that the level of training you get with someone depends largely on their experience and also their attitude; NOT on the equipment they're carrying in the crotch area.

I love the new schedule

2008-09-05T16:28:00.002+03:00

The new schedule, with two classes per night, is the best thing since sliced bread. I can now go three evenings per week, take four classes in all, and still have time and energy left over for my family. On Thursday, I actually caught myself thinking: "I love being here, because after class, I get to go home and see my children." When classes ran from 6 to 8 pm, I had to leave home by five, missing the family dinner, and I could never be home in time to put the kids to bed. Now I can have dinner with my family on Mondays, and tuck the kids into bed on Thursdays, and still train for what feels like a lot more than previously.

Life is good :)

Something went right

2008-09-04T16:36:00.003+03:00

Wednesday's rapier session was mostly spent in confusion, again. Guy fixed my arm position during lunges: the point is not supposed to arrive in a straight line, not even when practising against the wall, but instead the arm should be angled so that the wrist is straight. This also protects the fingers and the wrist when the point hits the target. I also earned some praise for a clean counterattack :) And to top it all off, I figured out why rapier scares me: I'm afraid of looking silly. When I look at people doing longsword or am holding one myself, I feel like it's really cool, and looks beautiful and powerful; when I look at people doing rapier, I think it looks poky-poky, with floppy wrists not far in the offing. And while I have several (male) friends who can execute the classic ranneliike (wrist flop) and keep looking like their lovely selves... it's not really me.

The longsword session went swimmingly. (Not in the sense of sweating a lot, but in the sense of having gone very well.) I'm so glad that the Syllabus Form has changed, because for a while I thought I'd been doing it wrong all this time! We did the exchange of thrust against a low thrust (ending in posta breve) rather than a high one (ending in fenestra). And I also have to mention (brag) that I did quite well in a dagger takedown drill, resulting in much raising of eyebrows by Guy, and in the push hands exercise.

So wow, now I actually feel really good about training!

The T-shirt thing

2008-09-01T22:22:00.000+03:00

Ilkka, I'm not blogging about that t-shirt thing.

It looked vaguely like an attack

2008-09-01T22:16:00.003+03:00

I hadn't realised that my brain has such a specific closing time; like all shops used to, it closes at 8 pm. Consequetly, today's rapier class (19:30-21:00 according to the new schedule) was mostly spent trying to remember if, in the very simple drill, I was supposed to do a contra-cavazione, a parry and strike in a single tempo or in dui tempi. Aaaaargh! The logic is easy enough, the execution not *that* difficult, but for some reason, my brain and my arm refused to agree on which technique to execute.

The title is what Orava said about my last cavazione-and-strike in an exercise where we were supposed to either attack or feint and attack, and the partner had to react accordingly. I can do a very good feint, thank you very much - with a longsword. It helps if you remember, again, which technique you're supposed to follow that feint with.

Meditation seminar

2008-08-31T19:41:00.004+03:00

The salle is crammed with great seminars this autumn. On Saturday, Dr Geo Trevarthen gave a meditation seminar that left me feeling the grass of a new path beneath my spiritual toes. Not only was it personally satisfying, if occasionally puzzling with regard to the things that meditation brought before me, and religiously empowering (it's not often that a homemade pagan like me encounters anyone else with even vaguely similar religious views), it was also immediately practical in terms of swords training! Unfortunately I'm one of those on whom holding the state of awareness while training has the effect of eliding my already fluffy technique even further... so I have to ask Guy how to use it to increase sharpness instead.

Aim the knee

2008-08-31T19:33:00.002+03:00

The way to keep the knee in line with the foot, the number one factor in preventing knee injuries in training, is to aim it deliberately. Spare enough concentration (at least to begin with) that you can deliberately keep it pointed towards your opponent, which in longsword most often coincides with where your foot is pointing. (Well, in a sense, anyway.)

You can also aim your entire body!

Okay, I'll stay.

2008-08-31T19:28:00.001+03:00

Thanks to everyone for the encouraging comments, especially Ken, Janka and Kevin (who I agree with ;) and of course Guy whose opinion is, in the end, the one that really counts apart from my own (this is a training blog, after all, and he's The Guy Who Tells Me What To Do).

Speaking of Guy, he linked to my blog from Swordforum, so he's not ashamed of me at least. Or alternatively lets me stew in my own juices. Yeah, yeah, it shouldn't matter but it does.

Blobblog

2008-08-28T21:38:00.002+03:00

After making the mistake of actually reading my blog, I'm thinking of deleting it entirely. The whole thing is mostly useless whining about why I can't train more, interspersed with statements that range from insulting through patronising to fatuous and liberally spiced with adolescent angst.

Only I'm not sure if the benefits of actually thinking about my training enough to commit it to computer don't outweigh the psychological costs of whining.

Spaghetti Bolognese

2008-08-28T21:23:00.002+03:00

The title refers to the state of my arm on Wednesday after an Ilkka-led session introducing the basics of Bolognese sidesword. Otherwise the class mainly strained the brain, what with having to cover the gazillion guards with vaguely fioreish (and yet not) names and the strikes which, to a longsword gal like me, were just wrong. Accressere with the wrong bloody foot and strike with that same hand? Gaah. At least stepping is easy: reserve the fancy stuff for when the right foot is forward. Well, easy, that is, if you can tell left from right.

Ilkka is to teach a sidesword seminar in October. I'm sufficiently intrigued that I'll attend, if I can work it into the various schedules of our family...

After class, Laura increased our spaghetti-like state by leading us in a few minutes' yoga session. I admit it was more confusing and anxiety-inducing than pleasant and relaxing, but no doubt this would be remedied by more practice.

Brilliant teaching seminar

2008-08-25T14:34:00.004+03:00

Over the weekend, Maestro Sean Hayes of Northwest Fencing Academy gave a brilliant two-day seminar on how to teach swordsmanship. It was a pleasure and a privilege to learn from such an accomplished teacher.

The seminar included instruction in various longsword techniques by Mr Hayes as well as instruction in giving individual lessons, leading a small group of students and observing a drill being executed by an entire class. Yours truly didn't get to do any of this (grumble ;) but derived considerable benefit from watching and being taught. (...and was pretty gratified to have various pedagogical principles she has followed and even mentioned in this blog be taught in class... ;)

(EDIT: aspects -> principles. Never watch cartoons, discipline daughter and write blog entry all at the same time.)

Apology

2008-08-22T23:12:00.002+03:00

Before the start of Thursday's class, I said a very weird, insulting thing to Joeli. I'm sorry. I plead insanity and the flu.

Syllabus form

2008-08-22T22:54:00.002+03:00

The form is so easy when you separate it into its component techniques. The lesson here is not to mush it all together and anticipate each technique about a step and a half in advance; but also not to take a coffee break between techniques.

D'oh.

Different sort of lesson

2008-08-22T22:09:00.002+03:00

On Wednesday I was sick, but I went to the salle anyway and asked Guy to think of a sitting-down project I could do that night, and preferably finish, too. Instead of the proofreading or formatting or research I expected, he plopped a pile of attendance records in my lap, an Excel file on my computer, and told me to enter the information in one into the other.

Remember my patronising remark about the lesson you came to learn isn't the one you walk away with? Hehe :) The attendance sheets and their little crosses told tales unimagined. For instance, without naming names or mentioning numbers, let's say that Certain People boost the average attendance figures ridiculously as each of them train as much as four average people put together. My 5-times-in-a-good-month-1-time-in-less-good in 2006 and mostly less since then just, well, doesn't cut it. My crosses for this month added up to a nice eight already, but does it make any difference whether I come to the salle five days a month or ten?

Fighter magazine article

2008-08-14T22:04:00.001+03:00

We are featured in the latest issue of Fighter magazine.

Indian push-up

2008-08-14T21:50:00.002+03:00

The funniest exchange of the day occurred when Guy demonstrated a new push-up and asked us to name it.
"Apache," I said, "because you put your ear to the ground."
"Apaches don't need to train," Guy pointed out.
"No, they just need to iron horse."

(The push-up ended being called the Komodo.)

Exploding rear leg

2008-08-14T21:49:00.000+03:00

Rapier today. The first half of the lesson caused bitching that I'd picked up the wrong weapon again, what with the aching leg and seriously dead arms and all, but the second half was actually enjoyable. I got my guard position fixed again. Firstly, the hilt really is turned all the way to horizontal in quarta and seconda. And secondly, there's no call to flap those elbows like a chicken in rapier, either, just relax them. Particularly the second correction made a world of difference to the general level of exhaustion and raised my arms from the dead.

The title refers to the fact that during a lunge, the toes of the rear foot turn for a reason, and the reason is not that they can't stand the toes of the front foot. (No pun intended. Not much.) Rather, there should be power coming out of that foot and leg.

My brain filled up at about a quarter to eight, but I was able to ask Maaret to explain again, slowly and simply, what I was supposed to do and it wasn't so bad.

Oops, wrong sword

2008-08-07T22:52:00.003+03:00

I thought I had solved the problem illustrated in the previous post: to disabuse people of the notion that I know things that I actually don't, I would start doing something I really obviously don't know and switch from longsword to rapier for a while.

Well, the best laid plans of mice and swordsmen etc.: when today's class started and Guy called "en garde", I realised I was holding the wrong damn sword - I had gone for my longsword by habit instead of the intended rapier.

Class was entertaining and challenging to exactly the right degree. We did dagger techniques first, including an opportunity to practice those devilish Eigth Master techniques. Then we moved on to First and Third Drills. The difficult quarter hour (which comes at the end of each class) didn't fry my brain this time(*) but offered the enjoyment of practising three counters to fendente mandritto from a low guard - specifically, frontale from tutta porta di ferro -> fendente (first action of First Drill), sottano from zenghiaro -> posta longa -> fendente (first action of Third Drill) and sottano from zenghiaro -> posta longa -> pommel strike (variation on Third Drill).

(*) Actually it's quite heartening to realise that no longsword class has fried my brain for quite a while now.

Hiding?

2008-08-07T22:47:00.002+03:00

Ilkka accused me of hiding behind my bew beginnership and "other problems" of neurological nature. Am I? Well, I'm certainly using my status as étudiant ordinaire as a shield to deflect incoming orders to show people how to do something I don't know how to do.

Other than that - nah nah, made ya look! Contrary to my usual modus operandi, I'm not going to write a long, whiney, semi-intellectual, halfway-analytical rant, I mean blog post, on this topic, this is just a teaser to get you poor readers all geared up to expect one :D

Useful solo training

2008-08-06T23:06:00.002+03:00

I went to the salle for free training after a wild shopping spree (yay, new training trousers!) and got through a gratifying amount of stuff: several cutting exercises, some Syllabus Form, wrist and arm conditioning, and punching the punch bag. I really have to ask someone for guidance in using the punch bag - I rather hurt my thumb...

The soundtrack makes all the difference. I played Dido on the stereo and listened to Hunter in a very fanficcy mood and was motivated like anything! :D

Just Don't: Un-Classleadership and How To Not Do It

2008-08-06T22:48:00.005+03:00

I never blogged about last Wednesday's class because I wanted to digest it for a while. It will go down in history as the only class when I told the class leader to stuff his direct order and refused to comply. I got away with it, too, which I probably shouldn't have done.

The occasion was Ilkka telling me to take the longsword portion of the class through the continuation of First Drill. I had already had them do some cutting exercises, and Ilkka wanted me to go on. I told him I wouldn't. He tried to make me. I told him I wouldn't some more. He got angry and ignored me for the rest of the class, then went home and wrote a blog post about people not appreciating what he does and not doing what he tells them. (Now I know Ilkka and I trust I can write things like the sentence above without making him an enemy for life...)

The problem here is a general one that I keep having, so please let me make this absolutely clear: I am not a class leader. I am not a free scholar. I'm just an almost-beginner making my way up the ladder, one who happens to know a bunch of almost useless stuff about principles and basics not unrelated to swordsmanship.

The reason I refused to lead the longsword class in anything more complicated than cutting exercises was that I really, really don't have anything to teach anyone. I can't even use the names of the postae and the blows in class because I'm bound to get them mixed up. I don't know First Drill (or, indeed, any other drill) well enough to demonstrate it, because I'm bound to become confused and freeze up. This is why I'm not a free scholar or class leader.

Increasing learning

2008-08-06T22:44:00.003+03:00

Universities are famous for labouring under a basic duality in their raison d'être: they have to both conduct research and teach students. This is not so much a problem for the university (well, perhaps it is, in these days of funding tied to performance=graduates) as it is for the staff who are usually more passionate about their research than their students' edification. The traditional solution is to spend as little time teaching students as possible, which is why university terms are so ridiculously short.

How, then, should the swordschool address the selfsame problem? :)

Read the paper!

2008-08-03T09:24:00.002+03:00

The article is ou. Today's Helsingin Sanomat featured the School of European Swordsmanship on page B7 in the sports section. Click here for the article (in Finnish).

Beginners ho!

2008-07-23T21:52:00.003+03:00

I talked with someone recently who had just started training at the School; she was worried that she was "in the way" during training and that she wasn't a useful training partner for others. This inspires me to write an entry about beginning and advancing.

Apart from the beginner's course, people of every level of expertise attend each class at the School. Everyone learns. The crucial thing to remember is that sometimes, what you came to the salle expecting to learn isn't what you actually learn. Everyone teaches their training partner something, and from every exercise each participant takes home some useful lesson - if they have the right attitude. Yes, if your partner doesn't know the beginning of First Drill, it's unlikely you get to work on your ligadura mezana at the end of First Drill - during that class, during that training bout. Instead, you get to work on your mandritto fendente, and let me tell you, whoever you are, whatever your training level, your fendente mandritto can still use more work. And you can work on your frontale defence, which needs even more work. Want more? Footwork. Timing. Footwork. Feel for the blade. Footwork. Lines of movement. Footwork. Balance. Footwork. Position of the arms. Footwork. Get my drift?

If you're more advanced than your partner, then if you're lucky, brave or just arrogant, you get to give them tips. That teaches you a) that maybe you know more than you thought you did; b) how to organise what you know, which helps with your own technique; and/or c) that you should probably shut up 'cause your tips turn out not to work. (In any case, most students love showing off by giving tips and explaining things to beginners. I hesitate to use the word instruct.)

And if you're a beginner and you're stuck with a partner who doesn't get this and is cross because he can't be learning what he thought he would - it's okay to avoid them for the rest of the class. Beginners is what the school is there for, in a sense. You're also not responsible for anyone else's training than your own. You are very wanted, very useful, and we love having you in class.

(The next beginner's course starts in September, by the way. :)

Basic class

2008-07-23T21:38:00.003+03:00

We had a photographer at the salle today so class was fairly basic. In fact, it was a very good glance at what a really regular class with basic material looks like:

Four unarmed guards exercise
Accressere-passare-tutta volta exercise with stick
Dagger techniques against mandritto (first master) and roverso (um, which master? Done with a tutta volta anyway)
Dagger disarm flow drill
Basic cutting exercise and "swimming lengths" (i.e., cutting while stepping)
First drill
Exchange of thrust
Breaking of the thrust, proceeding to passing forward to stab in the face and then taking the sword, and finally countering that with a pommel hook and encircling of the partner with the sword at his throat

I don't think I forgot anything... But notice how few things there are? Of course, Guy was busy talking to reporters much of the time so we got a lot of reps in.

But oh, it was sweaty work. We poor Finns aren't used to temperatures over +24 degrees centigrade... I would say I shudder to think of what the PHEMAS guys go through, training in Singapore, but it's less a shudder than a hot wave of empathy.

World enough, and time

2008-07-21T22:11:00.004+03:00

Amazing. I can actually do things at a slow pace and it can still be quick enough. I don't always have to have half my focus on increasing my speed and only leave one half for timing, footwork, stance, angle and all those other things - I really can take some focus away from speed and use it to contribute to technique. *Sigh* It only took, what, five-six years to figure this out?

Stop laughing, everyone. This is serious. Truly. Stop laughing, I say ;D

Moving on... For some reason, the longsword stability exercise was more difficult today than the one other time I've done it; specifically, it was harder on the shoulders. It could just be that working at my computer has made them seize up. On the other hand, the unarmed guards exercise went very well today, although only during free training, and my body became wonderfully reminded of what it feels like when footwork and guards happen correctly.

Lost in translation

2008-07-21T21:58:00.005+03:00

When following instructions in class, the reason why I always f...k up the first iteration of said technique is that for me, it counts as instruction, not training. This is because I can't translate between my senses, that is, words into actions or sight into sensation etc., I need to be instructed as I execute the technique - it's not enough to tell me or show me how, I need the tactile and proprioceptive sensation of actually doing the technique before I know what it is that I'm supposed to be doing. And my first rep is always that: self-instruction. In my head, I run through the things Guy said and what I saw him do (that is, the words I put together to describe his actions - thank goodness I can still describe in words, even if the reverse direction is Out Of Order), and try to make my body look vaguely like his and make it do the things that the description includes in order to figure out which technique this was and/or how it's supposed to feel and work.

Hopefully, identifying this problem will help me to get rid of it or at least work around it.

Form and function

2008-07-17T21:53:00.002+03:00

Today, instead of swordsmanship, Guy taught us the first few postures of the t'ai chi chuan form he knows, the Chen Man-ch'ing Yang Short Form (read more). It was more confusing than I expected, because I would have needed many, many more reps to get to grips with it, but, as Guy pointed out, all the other students did better with being given some theoretical background and applications so tough cookie. Besides the form itself, we did some push hands and a tiny amount of breathing exercises.

After class I took up my longsword and went through the syllabus form some dozen or twenty times. Sloppy, sloppy is all I can say, and I had huge difficulty focusing. This was probably due to the frustration caused by not learning the t'ai chi form.

Nothing to see here...

2008-07-15T21:27:00.002+03:00

...please disperse. Although this is markedly less spectacularly nothing than Frank Drebin's nothing.

I promised myself not to post unless something of interest occurred to justify posting. On Monday, nothing did, but now that I know people are reading the blog I get apprehensive lest my readers think I skip training if I fail to post :)

Monday was a great day in that I got to do a fairly large number of different sorts of things during the class and afterwards in free training. During class, I and about half a dozen others did abrazare, dagger and longsword, while another half-dozen trained with rapiers. Then those who had been present the previous Monday and had not quite managed to get to the end of the spear form switched to spears for fifteen minutes; then back to our original swords. After class, six or seven students joined Guy in a 20-minute conditioning session. Finally, I picked up my rapier (not fainting for fear this time) and practised in front of the mirror.

So nothing happened. Just almost everything.

Late-breaking news

2008-07-11T22:04:00.003+03:00

In case you're not aware, SESH has Open Day on Saturday July 12th from 11 am to 4 pm.

Sorry for the late announcement; been kind of busy preparing for my first-born's fifth birthday (today) and the party (on Sunday).

Scary rapier

2008-07-10T20:57:00.002+03:00

Using my shiny, new rapier in class on Wednesday revealed something very strange: I'm terrified of rapierwork! Throughout the class I felt disoriented, out of sorts and on the verge of tears - I had the usual (thankfully it's less usual these days) falling apart feeling to the power of ten. The consequent feelings of inadequacy and confusion only added to the feeling.

After class I had a talk with Guy, and he reached the same conclusions that I had already reached on my own: that my hating rapier is a self-fulfilling prophecy and my inability to understand rapier terminology and Guy's spoken explanations during class is caused by some mental block.

And all this because I'm scared stiff while I train with a rapier.

I haven't got a clue why I should be so scared. My current tentative theory is that the jab of hitting a target or a partner makes me wary, if only on the basis of absolutely hating that feeling of coming to a solid stop. Couldn't we please get sacks of hay to practice on?

But I love the way swordsmanship reveals all these bits and pieces, devices of my self for examination and, frequently, repair or at least tweaking.

Jyväskylä website

2008-07-07T22:47:00.000+03:00

Hey, they've got web pages! No one ever tells me these things...

Exercise update

2008-07-07T22:42:00.002+03:00

I can now stay in the plank for two minutes, of which 2x30 secs with an elbow up and 2x15 secs with a leg lifted. I can press my lower back to the floor for two minutes without much effort. I can do 2x15 wrist curls, 2x20 wing flaps and 2x20 wrist rotations with 1,5 kg weights. I can breathe with my diaphragm and my stomach muscles. I can fall fairly effortlessly and aim to take the impact with a specific part of my body.

Training form and format

2008-07-07T22:26:00.003+03:00

Henrik's way of teaching the form was very effective. First he showed us the whole form. Then he started teaching it step by step: first we executed the step in unison, then worked on the application as a pair drill, and then went back to doing the form all together, then we added a step and so on. (It's been a while since my last attendance at one of Guy's actual form classes, so I don't know if this is just his way of organising a form class.) He had created a spoken "soundtrack" for the form where each movement is described, and this constituted a big insight: the best way to commit a sequence of actions to memory is precisely to have such a soundtrack, a litany, almost a mantra, that you say to yourself, where the words remind you of the correct actions and if at all possible even preserve the natural pace and rhythm of the sequence. A numbered list is very well if you can hold it in your head, and it's easy to reference in writing, but a spoken litany is how the human mind works. And that is probably why Fiore's original writing doesn't use lists at all; not because it was the convention to do without them but because it simply works better as a litany.

But if the Fiore ms's are essentially illustrated litanies of this type, this represents an obvious problem: the litany doesn't have to be a complete description of the action to work; in fact, it can't be complete, because it would get too long to remember. That's why Fiore's ms's are replete with mnemonics, such as cultural references acting as zip files for a whole hoard of stuff, and bad poetry as an aide memoire.

Blade bliss

2008-07-07T21:48:00.003+03:00

I have a new rapier, tata-tada-ta-daa... My new rapier's nice, tata-tada-ta-daa... :)

All thanks go to my lovely husband who bought it for me for our 11th wedding anniversary. I first had another one in mind, and had reserved it, but sleeping on it (the decision, not the rapier) I decided on another one - my original choice was too fancy and girlish, and more importantly, weighted too far towards the hand for my liking. This one is all go and have at'em!

I like my rapier and am gooey over it, even though I'm more of a medievalist at heart. Orava said he liked the "rich bastard" aspect of the rapier; but I'm a simple peasant girl, I can't be expected to appreciate gentlemanly weapons.

Roots

2008-07-03T21:51:00.002+03:00

Today's class focused on rooting, that is, the swordsman's connection with the ground. Guy pointed out that when you're stiff, you're offering your opponent/partner access to your root; so stay relaxed and responsive. The exercise he offered was three-fold; first the familiar push hands exercise, then a new (for me) exercise where the partners stand facing each other and try to dominate the other's line and force their partner to take a step (using both hands and sneaky tricks); and finally a combination of the two, which is the old, old arm fencing exercise, or very like it.

He also demonstrated the already famous string-stick-snake thing: if your arms are like string, your opponent can use them to strangle you; if your arms are like sticks, he can beat you with them; but if your arms are like snakes, you can bite him.

Today was one of those days when my mistakes seemed to draw Guy's attention like a pot of honey would Winnie the Pooh's, even when they were caused by my partner doing something they shouldn't have. I didn't mind this time. The calming breathing exercise helped.

The Art of the Pelvic Tilt

2008-07-03T21:43:00.003+03:00

This was useful for someone today, so I'm writing it down here: Bring your iron door forward not by squeezing your buttocks or by pulling it forward with the muscles of the upper thigh, but by contracting your stomach muscles. If you use leg or butt muscles for it, it impedes movement because you need those muscles for stepping, but they're already in use.

Training, on and off

2008-07-02T23:07:00.005+03:00

The reason why some locks are difficult to apply on me is probably that I break my structure myself during training. I mean, if my structure is already broken, my parters/opponents can't very well be the ones to break it. Trouble is, when the structure is broken, it's not whole, and I can't use it for all the nifty stuff that I could do with my structure intact.

This is what Guy and Ilkka have been trying to tell me about not being committed to my attacks and giving up too soon.

The insidious thing about breaking your own structure is that in training, it really seems to work. People can't apply those nasty locks so easily and if they do manage it, it really hurts and your partner is the one to do the push-ups. It's also hard to safely throw to the ground someone who can break the connection between their feet, hips and shoulders and sort of redirect the force without moving. Kind of like a broken bone: can't apply locks to a broken arm, but unfortunately, that broken arm also can't apply locks or do any other damn thing!

It also doesn't ultimately help that I've learned to switch between "off" and "on" in a matter of nanoseconds and to randomly alternate between them when attacking in a subconscious attempt to puzzle my training partner. (I'm finally understanding what Lari meant when he said, about three years ago, that my attacks were sometimes soft and sometimes hard and you never knew which was coming.) The trouble there is that instead of training to do things the right way, the way that will be effective and win fights, I'm training to look good in training. I'm spending a fair amount of concentration and effort just in order to look good, even if it is unintentional.

The good news is, I actually do know what the "on" state feels like and how to get there, how to connect all the bits of my body together and take the attack from the feet on the floor up to the tip of the weapon. Now let's try and practice that, shall we?

Fiore seminar bitchin'

2008-06-27T23:47:00.002+03:00

I'm extremely annoyed not to be able to attend the five day Fiore seminar that is taking place at the school. So it is with a mixture of evil pleasure and honest disappointment to find that all blogging participants seem to be too tired to blog about it.

Links added

2008-06-27T09:02:00.000+03:00

I added some links in the left column.

Lady Global Celeb

2008-06-26T22:19:00.003+03:00

Today I had the pleasure to properly meet Tome. When I told him my name, he went "Oh, the Lady at the Gate!" (And I went something like "Um, [giggle] [false-modest shrug] yes, that's me.") It turns out I have a Singaporean audience, too :)

It does make me think, though, that I must be more careful to note how much of this blog is just my confused mutterings and yammerings and distorted reports of class dealings quoted out of context... I wouldn't want anyone to think I actually know anything!

Received wisdom

2008-06-26T22:06:00.004+03:00

In Fifth Drill, remember to execute the first counter early enough and aim far enough to the side; avoid the temptation to wait and strike a wedge with your sword along the fendente line, because it won't have enough of an angle.

To cut from posta di donna into bicorno, it's best to make the balance point of the sword move in a straight line towards the target and rotate the sword into place around it.

If your sword vibrates annoyingly after you beat another blade with it, you're hitting with the wrong part of the blade.

Don't become so infatuated with how nicely your cutting exercises are going that you hit your own ear with your sword. (Gaah.)

Use your iron door

2008-06-26T21:42:00.002+03:00

How's this for a weird statement: put your crotch through the other guy's head.

I suppose that needs a bit of explanation.

When using a weapon, be it sword, dagger or fist, or whatever, it's important to allow it to become part of your body and sort of infuse it with your awareness. Once upon a time Guy described the phenomenon of beginners' awareness being limited by their skin, and then, as they advance, they become more able to sense things through the blade, first in the handle only but gradually flowing down towards the tip of the blade. As that awareness dribbles down towards the tip, so does control and the ability to transfer power through the blade.

The iron door is, for me, the point of balance in my body, in terms of body mechanics. The name is just a signal of where that balance point is: the crotch, or more specifically the place where the hands rest in porta di ferro. That's where the bow I talked about earlier ends (although interestingly the last time I had reiki treatment done I felt for the first time how the bow extended all the way down to my feet).

My most successful cuts (or actions in general), those that are the most focused and the best controlled, happen when I'm able to use my bow to its full extent and get the power from the crotch end to the sword end. It is easiest to conceptualise as hitting my target with my iron door.

Beginner no longer

2008-06-26T21:29:00.002+03:00

The beginner's course is over. Ilkka made some sort of obscure point in handing me a SHMS membership form, too. (I've been a paying member for five years straight; I even paid my training fees during my sabbatical...)

We beginners got to do a fair amount of reps of the dagger disarm flow drill and First Drill. The ratio of re-beginners to actual beginners made for better training for all of us, I think, because the actual beginners had models to copy from and reminded the re-beginners that they actually already knew a fair amount.

Now I'm faced with a scheduling problem. To train on three times a week, I need to go to the salle on Monday, Wednesday and Thursday, as there's no training on Tuesday and Friday during the summer. Unfortunately, there's no babysitter service on Mondays (read: my mother is busy having a life of her own). Any ideas are appreciated. As are training partners for Fridays :)

Priorities

2008-06-26T21:22:00.002+03:00

Lately I've been prioritising sleep over blogging. Sorry, folks, but that's how it's gotta be sometimes.

What's not so good or commendable is that I've also been prioritising sleep, leisure and work over training and research. Bad Auri! And it wasn't even that much work, to be honest. I need to get my ass back in gear.

Learning, maybe

2008-06-17T22:11:00.003+03:00

Heikki, my husband, asked me yesterday how my swords thing was going and if I thought I was learning anything. This really gave me pause. How is it going, actually? Well, I'm having fun, and life feels balanced and worthwhile; but how is the swordsmanship coming along?

I do feel like I'm learning things, and relearning. Certainly much of my progress is a matter of improved physical conditioning and increased strength, but even so, there are a few things that I can think of just off the top of my head that I've learned (again) or that have improved since my sabbatical:

More stable in volta stabile
Improved stance
Footwork more mechanically sound
The new posta di donnas
The new drills (just went through all of them today with no huge, major hiccups!)
The idea of balancing purpose with responsiveness, or the importance thereof
The syllabus form
The accressere - passare - passare - tutta volta exercise

So yeah, I am learning. Cool :)

Is my face falling?

2008-06-17T22:08:00.002+03:00

Funniest exchange of the day:
A scabbard spontaneously falls off a rack during a cutting exercise, making a noise.
Ilkka (leading the class): "Be careful! That could have been someone's face!"
Orava: "Nobody touched anything, it just fell off."
Ilkka: "It still could have been someone's face."

Bad knee, good training, great food

2008-06-17T08:21:00.004+03:00

Ilkka's Monday warm-up failed to kill me, perhaps because my busted knee still prevents me from executing some moves. The knee still can't take much sideways pressure, in other words, putting my weight on it "crooked" can cause it to pop out of place. This means that star jumps, many leg stretches and some footwork exercises are out of the question, as is doing many squats in a row (although slow ones are fine). I'm also overprotective of the joint, which is perhaps better than not being so, but it makes me jump a little every time the knee twinges and/or straightens completely.

I don't know if my brain is getting better or if the training was fairly simple, but the fact is that there was nothing really difficult about the training session and no new things to learn. Even the Gruelling Drill, in reality called the stability exercise, wasn't very gruelling and certainly not complicated. In spite of this, or perhaps because of this, the session was enjoyable and boosted my confidence somewhat.

After training we sat down to an excellent meal of curry prepared by our resident salle chef Ken whom we tried to persuade to relocate to Finland permanently :)

Abs, abs, abs

2008-06-17T08:10:00.003+03:00

Building core strength through ab and back exercises has an amazing effect on training efficiency. When my lower back is mobile and painless, I can assume a proper guard position, which in turn allows me to be properly grounded and to generate power appropriately, leading to decreased tiredness and increased focus on the training task at hand. Thus my training is improved overall by a few simple ab and back exercises every day.

Workout

2008-06-15T20:50:00.003+03:00

Wahoo, my muscles are growing! A minute and a half in plank tonight, other ab and butt exercises on top of that, ten scoops without trouble, then ten push-ups on top of that. It sounds measly, but it's a big deal for me. I haven't been as out of shape as I was three weeks ago since high school (and that's saying something!), but now my quick-healing, quickly accumulating muscles seem to be getting me back on track.

This is not all to the good, of course. The last time that I restarted swords training (three years ago... my goodness, has it been that long?!?) I ended up over-muscled and under-skilled, compensating with brute force for lack of technique in things that I had known but forgotten.

Close your eyes and think of England

2008-06-12T22:11:00.004+03:00

My cuts have gone all wobbly all of a sudden - or maybe they've always been wobbly and I'm only noticing it now. What seems to help is, firstly, only paying attention to the start and end points, i.e., the guard positions at either end; and secondly, thinking of the motion as a cut instead of just moving the blade. In other words, keep intent and line true. Alas, doing this pretty much removes the blade from my control, and so I can't do it during pair practice because the end position is almost always inside my partner's silhouette...

Pleasure in training

2008-06-11T22:11:00.003+03:00

Kevin's comment on my image or focus problem inspired me to note that I actually seldom feel pleasure during training. (During training, here, refers to class time or focused training time.) Lately, since my sabbatical, it's happened about once per session, perhaps half a minute at a time, but that's just a fluke - I went through about three years of training when I felt good during training about a total of one minute in all those years, dispersed over three or four separate occasions. Mostly it was just plod, plod, plod, and is it time for the end salute yet.

I did learn new stuff all the time during those three years, which is a pleasure in itself and the thing that kept me coming back, but I didn't get that feeling of "Yes!" or "This is so cool!" when looking at demonstrations or, heaven forbid, actually doing the stuff demonstrated. I certainly didn't get that quiet tingling in the stomach that signals deeper, more permanent pleasure. (No, not that kind.) I wonder if the people who read this blog (there are at least five of you!) get that.

Salle visitor

2008-06-10T22:11:00.002+03:00

We have a visitor staying at the salle: Ken from PHEMAS in Singapore. Hard to find a nicer guy and a better training partner, so we're glad to have him :)

Better Life Through Abdominal Muscles

2008-06-10T21:56:00.002+03:00

The world will be saved by doing abdominal exercises. When the abdominals are weak, the back seizes up and hurts. This makes one cranky. The crankiness and pain make movement and concentration difficult, resulting in more crankiness and pain. So if everyone would only train their abs, the world would be a better place with more sixpack stomachs.

And I actually did conditioning exercises today after class: abs, wrists, push-ups, head lifts (for throat and neck muscles), but mostly abs.